Is That All He Thinks About?: How to Enjoy Great Sex with Your Husband

Marla Taviano
Harvest House (2007)
ISBN 0736918981
Reviewed by Patty Inglish for Reader Views (6/07)

What is a godly marriage? According to the Hebrew alphabet word-pictures, it is the union of man and woman with God embedded in its center. This marriage under God, then, joins three personalities and all three function in the couple’s sex life. Many people find this shocking at first, but it is a fact that can free a Christian couple to love one another more fully.

Sex can be frustrating to Christian wives in reconciling spiritual and physical needs. However, clergymen such as Rev. Frederick K.C. Price have stated that there is nothing better than married sex, because God is involved. Such professionals feel that godly sex is a miracle that must not deteriorate into an annoying chore or ugly duty over time.

“Is That All He Thinks About?” is a good reference for maintaining excitement and joy in married sex. For a healthy Christian couple, sex should parallel prayer in its regular occurrence. This book helps women see their sexual relationship as nothing trivial, unwanted, or repulsive, but one to cherish. However, while some wives feel that they should satisfy their husband’s needs and not their own, this is not optimal. Alternatively, a wife may demand all her needs met first before satisfying her husband’s desires. This is also not going to work.

Husband and wife can be mutually satisfied, as well as drawn deeper into the godly marriage bond. A Christian wife can also improve her own skills and attitudes to bring refreshing, joy-filled perspectives to the marriage bed.  This, in turn, can bring about pleasant changes in her husband. There is nothing wrong with the wife taking the first step, at least some of the time, if wife and husband are truly partners.

Ms. Taviano shows how to discard the “meet my needs first” attitude, as well as to express female desire assertively. She also teaches that in the presence of past sexual improprieties, wife and husband must forgive each other and themselves and then drop the subject. She gives creative lovemaking suggestions with full instructions that can help newlyweds and those at their 50th Anniversary alike. Couples can then discuss and choose the activities that fit their personalities. In agreement with the author, I would discard the notion of using pornography as a tool for excitement, because it replaces reality with addictive fantasies and inanimate objects.

Ms. Taviano targets the excuse of “no time for sex” head-on. “Too busy” is often an excuse for avoidance and it is better to face the topic of sex for a final resolution. The author describes this cure as a kind of parallel to tithing. Folks often find that after beginning to tithe, they become more organized and actually have more money available for paying bills and recreation. The author believes, further, that when she and her mate began to have sex more regularly, she began to have more time for other tasks and became more productive. It was a double blessing.

God gave humans sex as a gift. As Rev. Price has alluded, it is a communication and ecstasy powerful beyond words. Who would not want that?

Some women have the fear of losing oneself in marriage and becoming only “his wife.” However, if God is truly central in marriage, then mates are partners. “Helpmeet” in Hebrew original texts means defender of the husband, not slave to him. English itself changed later to mean “servant,” but the Hebrew stayed the same. Discarding the English “update” frees a couple to become Christian partners in marriage and a joyous sex life! Above all, Christian couples should pray together for the health of their sexual relationship, just as they do for prosperity in all other areas.

“Is That All He Thinks About?,” by Marla Taviano, is a wonderful manual that can help married women of all ages, while engaged women can study it in preparation for added joy with their new husbands.

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