Anonymous Lawyer: A Novel

Jeremy Blachman
Henry Holt (2006)
ISBN 0805079815
Reviewed by Tammy Petty Conrad for Reader Views (8/06)

I loved this book! But based on the title, “Anonymous Lawyer”, it normally would be the last book I’d pick up. And the concept of a book written as a blog didn’t thrill me either, especially since I haven’t even seen a blog on the Web (I know, I’m a Neanderthal). But it is devilishly funny. So wicked you know you shouldn’t laugh, but you can’t help yourself. The scene where a fifty seven page memo is not long enough is hysterical!

The main character is the ultimate lawyer who gives everything to his firm. As the hiring partner, Anonymous Lawyer lives at the office and hates everyone there. He enjoys torturing employees, actually thinks it’s his duty. When he discovers blogging, the world has access to his warped mind and all the details about life in a big city law firm. He has an outlet where he can secretly share the details no one on the outside is supposed to know. This guy is so anal he’s already decided to change the firm’s colors when he becomes the chairman in twenty years because cornflower blue isn’t masculine enough. He also has a problem with men’s ties with unapproved patterns.

There is nothing politically correct here. Every minority is dished.  The only names employees have are monikers such as The Jerk or The One Who Doesn’t Know How to Correctly Apply Her Makeup. Not even his family gets names. No one escapes his scrutiny or cruelty. Except for Anonymous Niece. She corresponds via email with her uncle and tries to help him stay grounded. He tries to convince her to join the firm when she graduates from Yale. The only thing I got tired of was hearing about how great Yale was!

The author, Jeremy Blachman, began a blog in 2004 based on the premise of a fictional partner in a law firm speaking his mind and you can still see it at www.anonymouslawfirm.com. He did go to law school, but he states that he went with the dream of becoming a writer. An unusual career path for sure.

As the story develops, our rude partner tells more and more about what’s really going on at the firm and his site acquires quite a following. Visitors email him with comments, questions and requests to be hired. As always, our character keeps it in perspective - reminding them that they don’t even know if he’s really a lawyer.

I won’t tell you whether he gets found out or whether he learns any life lessons. And I can’t reveal the ending; I had to reread the last two pages twice to make sure I got it. I’m still trying to decide if I did.

 I will just say that anyone who has had to work with a lawyer will enjoy this book. Law students will be stealing copies from the library. And anyone who’s worked in any kind of office or with someone like Anonymous Lawyer won’t be able to put it down. This would be fun to read in a book club to hear the opinions of others on the satire and whether it’s too much over the top. Or too much like real life.

As someone who’s currently trying to work with a lawyer (when he returns my phone calls), I found myself chuckling out loud while reading late at night. I haven’t decided yet if I’m going to give a copy to my lawyer. If I do, it will definitely be after I get my bill.

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